


There's A China Doll In The Bullpen

by MsDamia, tiziano



Series: Music Makes The Multi-Verse Go 'Round [3]
Category: Captain America (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Darcy don't put up with sass, Feminism, Fluff, He didn't really have a choice, Not Captain America: Civil War (Movie) Compliant, Pop Culture, Slice of Life, Soulmate AU, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, Steve isn't sure what he's gotten into, Unless it's from Steve, abuse of hashtags, all of the emojis, dating is a war zone, friend zoning isnt a thing, steve learns twitter
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-06-23
Updated: 2016-12-15
Packaged: 2018-07-16 17:39:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,679
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7277563
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MsDamia/pseuds/MsDamia, https://archiveofourown.org/users/tiziano/pseuds/tiziano
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Steve meets his Soulmate and she proceeds to send him diving head first into modern feminism, pop culture, Urban Dictionary, and extreme emoji use. Steve, in turn, teaches Darcy to cook as he is of the opinion that Poptarts are not real food.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

_Forget the bull in the china shop_  
_There's a china doll in the bullpen_  
_It's all in the wrist, fire from the hip_  
_Talk a little shit, roll thick_  
_Whole clique_  
_Let's begin_  
**\--- Dessa**

 

“You’d be prettier if you smiled.” The security guard was smiling flirtatiously at Darcy Lewis as the young woman tipped her head to the side and cocked an eyebrow. Steve looked down, hiding the smirk on his mouth as he glanced up through his eyelashes to watch what was sure to come. She had that same flat look on her face that Natasha got when someone did something she found to be truly stupid. 

“Do you realize that commentary like this dictates a societal expectation of how we, as women, are supposed to look despite any of our own personal preferences and that this, in turn, stifles our natural ability for self expression?” Her voice was flat and thoroughly unimpressed. Steve crossed his arms, lifting one hand to half cover his mouth as his smirk grew and the security guard blinked.

“Look, it was just a compliment,” the man tried to explain. Darcy planted a hand on one hip and took a sip from her neon green coffee cup. She was always walking around with a coffee mug of some sort, not that he’d been looking at her in particular, of course. Not when Sam or Natasha were around, anyhow. 

“A compliment is telling me I look pretty. An insult is telling me I don’t look pretty when I don’t smile. A criticism is telling me I don’t smile often enough. Backhanded compliments are telling me something good while you tell me something bad and man-splaining is telling me I’m wrong when I’m obviously right.” Now she raised both eyebrows and took another drink from her coffee cup. 

“Look, I was paying you a compliment, if you want to take it that far out of context that’s on you, not me.” The man backpedaled, obviously annoyed at the entire situation. 

“Trying to make me feel crazy by twisting my words is called gaslighting.” She smiled brightly at the man, waiting for him to go on. He didn’t. Smart. Darcy waited another beat before moving past the security checkpoint and heading to the science wing. 

Steve stayed back, sunglasses, leather jacket, and jeans stopping people from noticing him. Natasha had been right - people saw what they wanted to see. A bomber jacket and aviators and they looked right past him. Captain America was clean cut and wholesome, far too serious. Steve Rogers was a normal guy, people couldn’t see him without the uniform on. He dropped his hands and moved forward, taking his glasses off and smiling politely. 

Or, he was smiling politely, but then the guard called Darcy a bitch. Sure, it was under his breath and muttered in a defensive huff because the man had been schooled on his behavior, but even so, Steve couldn’t put up with that. He stopped smiling and put on his disappointed face. 

“Son, you might want to think about what you say before you say it.” The tall blond told the stockier brunette. 

“Sir.” The guard snapped to attention. 

“You might also want to brush up on the company policy as it regards harassment of any kind before you make the mistake of talking to someone more dangerous than Ms. Lewis like that. I know quite a few women who wouldn’t be as polite as she was.” He noted, waiting for the green light to flash so he could move through the checkpoint. 

“You’re adorable and mean well, so I’m finding it hard to be mad, but I’m definitely annoyed.” A voice informed him from beside a bank of elevators. His blue eyes found Darcy Lewis, formidable shield maiden (according to Thor) and keeper of the scientists (according to the plaque on her office door.)

“I don’t know what to apologize for …” He trailed off, blinking a bit as he realized the woman in front of him was definitely his soulmate and he likely should have worked up the courage to talk to her before now, but also that he had done something wrong. Her messy scrawl circled almost entirely around his waist, the first Y looping playfully around his belly button. It had been quite a surprise when he’d first woken up.

“Well damn, now I can’t be annoyed either.” She grinned and the door to the elevator opened. She got on first, scanned her card, and leaned against a corner while he leaned against the opposite deciding to follow her around (NOT like a puppy!) for now. 

“So, what did I do?” He asked. 

“You let him off the hook.” The woman informed him, scraping her hair behind her ear with an impatient flick of her fingers. 

“I wasn’t aware that was what I was doing.” Steve informed her, perplexed. He supported feminism and equality for all, always had. He’d been raised by a tough single mother who had a sick kid that couldn’t help out much. He worked with Natasha “Black Widow” Romanova on a daily basis. He knew women were just as strong and capable as men. She grinned up at him. 

“I know, that’s why I’m not that upset. Still, you basically swept in behind me and told him you get it, but he should do better.” She was gesturing grandly with her hands, coffee slopping up the sides of the mug but never over the rim. “That’s great and he _should_ do better, but not because you told him to. He should do better because his first instinct shouldn’t be to make a woman prove she’s good enough for him.” 

“So what should I have done instead?” He asked, honestly curious.

“Report him. Show him that other men hear it and aren’t okay with it. If you don’t like when people act like that, do something about it. Don’t kick it under the rug like a good old boy.” She told him. “Men have to police other men because women are seen as hysterical for not wanting to perpetuate rape culture and the mentality that women will never be as good as men.” 

“Rape culture?” He said it slowly, not liking the taste of the first word at all. 

“It means that in our society sexual violence against women is normalized and excused in the media and popular culture. We see it and too many people just ignore it. Also victim blaming is a huge problem. A woman gets attacked and the media asks what they were wearing and how much they had to drink.” Darcy continued, stepping off the elevator and toward the labs. He followed her, brows furrowed as he thought about that. 

“What does what they were wearing have to do with being raped?” He asked, confused again and feeling a little sick at the idea. 

“Exactly!” She cried, throwing her arms wide as she stepped into the labs. “Put a pin it for a second, though, I love getting all up in my feminism but I need to check on Jane.” She set her cup on her desk and disappeared through a doorway.

Steve sat down on a mostly clean table and pulled out his phone, googling the terms she’d been using. He had a feeling he was going to need a boost if he was going to keep up with Darcy, she was a firecracker and this conversation was likely going to continue for quite some time.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Steve learns more about Twitter and also about the Friend Zone

_Ain't nothin' wrong with this chemistry_  
Ain't nothin' wrong with this blasphemy  
And time tell that there's the pedigree  
Experience is another one meant for me   
**\---The Heavy**

It was two weeks later and Darcy had thrown Steve headfirst down a rabbit hole of modern feminism, equality, and social media. It was a whirlwind of information and he wasn’t entirely sure he was really grasping all of it, but Darcy was all smiling patience and fun anecdotes. She was also emojis. A _lot_ of emojis. 

They’d had three dates over the last two weeks, she’d told him she wanted to be wooed in an old fashioned way and he’d been both nervous and relieved. Nervous because he hadn’t actually ever done that without Bucky, relieved because at least he understood that more than the modern version of dating or hooking up or the myriad of other things he’d gotten from a very scary google search which had made Tony cackle with glee. He really should have known not to ask the billionaire. 

Steve was walking upstairs with three Mexican Mochas from the nearby coffee shop to try and entice his Soulmate out of the lab for a little while. The third coffee was for Jane, because she was very good at looking hurt and trying not to show it, which Darcy swore was a manipulation tactic used by many addicts, but he still fell for it. Considering Darcy used the same look he was pretty sure they practiced together, but since most people brought an extra 2 coffees to the labs the women weren’t likely to stop any time soon. 

“You are the best thing since sliced bread,” Darcy announced as she spotted him, grinning widely and pressing her tongue to the roof of her mouth. 

“You say that to all the boys who bring you coffee,” he told her, an amused smile playing across his face. 

“That is very true.” She nodded and bounced over, taking one of the coffees and inhaling the smell. 

“I actually had a question for you, though,” he said her, pulling out his phone. 

“Let’s see if I have an answer.” She took a sip, humming happily before peeking down at the glowing screen in his hands.

“There is a little blue circle with a checkmark in it next to my name on Twitter. It wasn’t there before and yours doesn’t have one so I was wondering what it meant.” He turned the phone toward her, face open and expectant. She grinned up at him. 

“You, my friend, have reached celebrity status and the checkmark means this is a verified account and you really are Steve Rogers, the one and only Captain America.” She patted him on the shoulder with a grin as he grinned and typed out a quick tweet.

**@CapnRogers** _Checked out official - I’m apparently me!_

Darcy laughed proudly as her desk chimed and he glanced over at her computer and then back at her with a grin. 

“Are you following me on twitter, Ms. Lewis?” He asked. 

“Dude, I’m like one step shy of full on cyberstalking you. To be fair, though, it’s mostly to make sure you don’t accidentally commit a social faux pas you have no hope of understanding at this juncture in your Interweb Adventuring.” She admitted with a half shrug as her scientist wandered in, hazel eyes glued to the coffee cups in Steve’s hands. 

“This one’s yours,” Steve offered, holding out the drink carrier toward the astrophysicist. 

“You’re a wonderful man,” Jane told him, patting Darcy absently on the shoulder before moving back to whatever she’d been doing. 

“Pretty sure she’s in the midst of a breakthrough again, we should have new rules of physics shortly. I love it when she breaks the old boys club into little bits and scatters them about behind her for being too slow to keep up.” Darcy grinned wickedly after her before grinning up at Steve. 

“That’s in reference to the glass ceiling?” He asked, following her over to her desk and taking a seat. 

“It was not, but I’ll take it!” She grinned over at him before focusing back on her computer and putting on new music. Steve’s phone buzzed and he looked down. 

**@Hawkeye4Real** _I’m not sure I believe it. I call shenanigans!_  
 **@Darcyland** _I’m surprised you can spell shenanigans_  
 **@Hawkeye4Real** _Word of the day calendar._  
 **@Darcyland** _#notsurprisedanymore_

“If Jane is breaking physics and physicists alike, does that mean I can pick your brain on other issues?” Steve asked, settling his long frame into a chair and setting his phone on the desk. 

“Twitter issues? What did I miss?” Darcy’s fingers flew over the keyboard in front of him and he could see the reflection of his twitter page in her glasses as he grinned at her. 

“Facebook, actually. Tony posted a joke about friend zoning and I just wasn’t sure what it meant.” Steve continued, brows furrowing a touch. All he really knew was people either found it hilarious or offensive and he wasn’t sure why. He’d never heard the term before. 

“Tony is a douchebag, treat everything he says accordingly.” Darcy informed him immediately. 

“I usually do,” he admitted, a smirk playing in the corner of his rather expressive mouth. 

“Picture, if you will, a battlefield.” Darcy said, shoving off with her foot to spin idly in his direction and gesturing expansively with her hands. Steve’s eyebrows raised and his lips quirked up a bit, but he nodded in ascent so the petite brunette continued. “You have the enemy territory, the people you aren’t mentally or physically attracted to. Then you have your personal territory. I dunno, let’s call it a trench. So you have your trench. This is your space.”

“You’re comparing dating to war, you realize this, right?” Steve asked her, not sure if he should be amused or concerned. 

“Oh, Steve, my sweet Summer Child, that is exactly what dating is.” She told him, shaking her head sadly before clapping her hands and gesturing to the points of the map she was imagining in the air. “So your trench is your personal autonomy. You can let other people in if you want to, maybe it’s connected to other trenches, I dunno, it depends on what you’re into I guess. Anyway, Your trench is located in on the good side, light side? I dunno, it’s just where people you like, go. You know? Siblings, parents, cousins, that one weird uncle everyone seems to have, friends. This is your side, you following me?” Her eyes caught his again, deep blue and expectant. 

“I think so,” He nodded slowly. “It is the zone your friends are in, but not actually the friend zone?” 

“Right. The Friend Zone doesn’t really exist. It’s propaganda put out by moles who want in your trench and weren’t invited. The friend zone is mustard gas they are hoping chokes you enough that you stop fighting and they can do what they want.” The brunette dropped her hands to the arms of her chair and raised her eyebrows at Steve. 

“You used trench as a euphemism, didn’t you?” He asked her after a moment, a touch of color lighting his cheeks. It wasn’t because he was embarrassed at sexual jokes, no, it was because it had taken him so long to figure out and because her lips spread into such a wolfish grin.

“Why, Steve, whatever kind of a girl do you take me for?” She did that thing where she dropped her voice an octave and sounded like she was half purring as she snagged her coffee and brought it to her lips, eye dancing mischievously. 

“You’re no girl, you’re a firecracker masquerading as a human.” He retorted, his own shy smile growing as she threw back her head and laughed delightedly. 

“How about you explain this to me a little more in depth over drinks?” He continued after she’d settled down a bit. 

“Are you asking me out on a date, soldier?” She demanded.

“Yes, ma'am, I am.” 

“Good.” She took a sip of her coffee, stood up, and walked further into the labs to go find Jane. It was a dismissal, and one she had used many times. Apparently she didn’t believe in goodbyes, but that was a talk for another time. He pulled out his phone and sent a quick text to Sam, letting him know he’d asked out his soulmate. He rather liked cellphones and texting. Information could be shared much more quickly. There were drawbacks, of course, but in all he was a fan of communication.


End file.
